Clean Jokes for 6-Year-Olds
205 free, clean jokes hand-picked for 6-year-olds: six-year-olds are deep in their first wordplay era. Tap any joke to reveal the punchline.
Animal Jokes (77)
What do sea lions say when they hear a bad joke?
That’s the seal-iest thing I’ve ever heard.
How do ducks celebrate 4th of July?
Firequackers
How do polar bears make their beds?
Sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
How do squids get to school?
They take an octobus
How do you stop a bull from charging?
You unplug it!
How do young bees get to school?
They take the school buzz!
How much money does a skunk have?
One scent
How can you tell which rabbit is the oldest?
Look for grey hares.
How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Ten (tickles)
What candy do bumble bees love the most?
Bumble gum
What did Mama cow say to Baby cow?
It’s pasture bedtime
What did the dad buffalo say when his little boy left for school?
Bison!
What did the alpaca say when he wanted to go on a picnic?
Alpaca lunch
What did the birds call the owl telling jokes?
Hoot-larious
What did the cat say when it fell down the stairs?
Me-ow!
What did the cowboy say when his dog ran away?
Doggone it!
What did the Dalmatian say after lunch?
That hit the spot!
What did the dog say when it sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!"
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick?
Put it on my bill!
What did the wolf say when it stubbed its toe?
Owwwww-ch!
What do cats always wear when they go to bed?
Paw-jamas
What do cows order from? Cattle-logs!
Cattle-logs!
What do frogs order at fast-food restaurants?
French flies and a Croak-a-Cola.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear!
What do you call a bee that buzzes quietly?
A mumble bee
What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?
A maybe!
What do you call a cow that plays the saxophone?
A moo-sician
What do you call a cow who gets her way all the time?
Spoiled milk!
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
What do you call a duck that gets all A’s?
A wise quacker
What do you call a fish without an eye?
A fsh
What do you call a fly with no wings?
A walk
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious
What do you call a huge pile of cats?
A meowtain!
What do you call an alligator with a vest?
An investigator!
What do you call an ant who fights crime?
A vigilante!
What do you call bears with no ears?
B
What do you get if you cross a pie and a snake?
A pie-thon
What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot?
A Walkie-talkie
What do you write in a rabbit’s birthday card?
Hoppy birthday!
What happened to the frog whose car broke down?
He had to be toad!
What is a bird’s favorite type of math?
OWL-gebra!
What is a cat’s favorite color?
Purrr-ple!
What is a cow’s favorite type of movie?
A Moo-sical
What is a frog’s favorite summertime treat?
Hopsicles
What is the most valuable type of fish?
A goldfish!
What is the smartest insect?
A spelling bee
What it it called when a dinosaur makes a soccer goal?
A dino-score
What kind of lion doesn’t roar?
A dandelion
What kind of music do whales like?
They listen to the orca-stra!
What kind of photos will you find on a turtle’s phone?
Shell-fies
What kind of socks do grizzlies wear?
None, they have bear feet!
What side of a turkey has the most feathers?
The outside!
What time do ducks wake up?
At the quack of dawn
What type of pizza do dogs like to order?
Pup-peroni
What type of shoes do frogs have the most of?
Open-toad shoes
What’s a duck’s favorite ballet?
The Nutquacker!
What’s a sporty goat’s go-to drink?
Goat-arade
When a bird needs to invest her money, what does she do with it?
Puts it in the stork-market
When do monkeys fall from the sky?
Ape-ril showers
Where do fish keep their money?
In the River-Bank!
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snowbank!
Where do sheep go on vacation?
The Baaa-hamas
Which bird is always out of breath?
A puffin!
Why are spiders so smart?
They can find everything on the web!
Why did the bird go to the hospital?
Because it needed some tweetment
Why did the giraffes get bad grades?
She had her head in the clouds
Why did the pony get sent to his room?
He wouldn’t stop horsing around!
Why do birds fly?
It’s faster than walking
Why do fish live in saltwater?
Pepper makes them sneeze! ACHOOOOOO!!!!!!
Why do goats have trouble making friends?
They always butt heads
Why do porcupines always win the game?
They have the most points
Why do shrimp never share?
Because they’re shellfish
Why does a seagull fly over the sea?
Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.
Why don’t cats like online shopping?
They prefer catalogs
Why is a snake difficult to fool?
You can’t pull its leg!
Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide?
Because it’s always spotted
School Jokes (8)
If a math teacher had four oranges in one hand and five oranges in the other hand, what would they have altogether?
Really big hands!
What did the paper say to the pencil?
Write on!
What did the teacher say when a book fell on their head?
I have only my shelf to blame.
Why can’t the music teacher start his car? He left his keys on his piano!
He left his keys on his piano!
Why did two 4s skip dinner?
Because they 8 already
Why isn’t there a clock in the library?
Because it tocks too much
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7, 8, 9
Why was the triangle the MVP of the basketball team?
It always made three-pointers!
Nature Jokes (8)
Can February March?
No, but April May.
How can you tell if a tree is a dogwood tree?
By its bark!
How do mountains stay warm in winter?
Snowcaps
How do trees get on the internet? They log on.
They log on
What did one volcano say to the other?
I lava you!
What did the big rose say to the little rose?
"Hi, bud!"
What did the flower say after it told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg
What is the best way to decorate a snowman’s birthday cake?
Lots of ice-ing
Food Jokes (26)
Did you hear about the kid who drank eight sodas?
He burped 7-Up
What are a pizza’s favorite type of jokes?
Cheesy ones!
What candy is always running late to things?
Choco-late
What did the lunchbox say to the banana?
You really have appeal.
What do cowboys put on their salads?
Ranch
What do you cakes and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter!
What do you call a fake noodle?
An Impasta
What do you call a retired vegetable?
A has-bean!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call two bananas?
Slippers
What do you give a hurt lemonade?
Lemon aid!
What do you have to add to soup to make it gold soup?
Fourteen carrots
What is a pony’s favorite juice?
She really likes lemon-neigh’d.
What is a really sad strawberry called?
A blueberry
What is a tree’s favorite beverage?
Root beer!
What is the best day to eat fast food?
Fry-day
What’s the difference between broccoli and boogers?
Kids don’t eat broccoli!
Where does fruit go on vacation?
Pear-is!
Why are peppers the best at archery?
Because they habanero!
Why did the baker put the cake in the freezer?
She wanted to ice it!
Why did the boy throw a stick of butter out the window?
Because he wanted to see a butterfly!
Why did the cookie have to go to the doctor?
It was feeling crummy
Why did the honeydew jump into the lake?
It wanted to be a watermelon.
Why do beets always win?
Because they are un-beet-able!
Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?
Because they cantaloupe
Why do we put candles on top of birthday cakes?
Because it’s hard to light them from the bottom!
Holiday Jokes (11)
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? A pumpkin patch.
A pumpkin patch
What do ghosts like to eat in the summer?
I Scream
What do you call pumpkin who works at the beach?
A life-gourd
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
frostbite
What does an evil hen lay?
Deviled eggs
What does the ghost always order when he goes to the Italian restaurant?
Spook-hetti
What is a scarecrow’s favorite fruit?
A strawberry
What’s a witch’s favorite school subject?
Spelling!
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was out standing in his field.
Why do all witches wear black?
So you can’t tell which witch is which.
Why do vampires seem sick all the time?
Because they’re always coffin!
More Jokes (28)
How can you make a tissue dance?
Put a little boogie in it!
How do they answer the phone at the paint store?
Yellow!
How do you organize a space party?
Planet early
What’s a foot long and slippery?
A slipper
Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights
What day of the week are most twins born on?
Twos-day!
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
It smells like carrots over here!
What did the fisherman say to the magician?
Pick a cod, any cod!
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells!
What did the lightbulb say to its sweetheart?
I wuv you a watt!
What do lawyers wear when they go to court?
Law-suits
What do snowmen call their kids?
Chill-dren
What do you call a belt made of watches?
A waist of time!
What do you call a train with a cold?
A-choo choo train!
What happened when the world’s tongue-twister champion got arrested?
They gave him a tough sentence!
What is a computer programmer’s favorite snack?
Computer chips!
What is a pirate’s favorite school subject?
Arrrrrrrrt
Where do sailboats go when they’re sick?
To the dock!
Why are robots never afraid?
They have nerves of steel
Why can’t Elsa have a balloon?
Because she will let it go
Why did the bicycles fall over?
Because they’re two-tired!
Why did the boy put his money in the freezer?
He wanted cold, hard cash
Why did the kid cross the playground?
To get to the other slide
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed
Why does it take pirates a long time to learn the alphabet?
Because they can spend years at C!
Why don’t lamps sink when they’re in water?
They are so light
Why was the broom running late?
It over-swept
Riddles & One-Liners (20)
How do you make seven an even number?
Remove the S
How is it that I only know 25 letters of the alphabet?
I just don’t know y!
I started writing a story about a broken pencil, but I gave up because it was pointless.
Mr. Red and Ms. Red live in the red house; Mr. Purple and Ms. Purple live in the purple house. Who lives in the white house?
The president
Pickles don’t just enjoy their food, they relish it
There’s a girl on a boat in a pretty pink coat. What’s her name?
"What" is her name
What animal wears shoes while sleeping?
A horse
What do you cakes and baseball have in common?
They both need a batter!
What do you call an angry clock?
Ticked off!
What do you call babies in the army?
Infantry!
What has hands but can’t clap?
A clock!
What has more letters than the alphabet?
The post office!
What has thousands of ears but can’t hear at all?
A cornfield
What has two legs but can’t walk?
A pair of pants!
What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
An elephant’s shadow
What starts with gas and has three letters?
A car
What’s something that falls but will never hit the ground?
The temperature.
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar
Where will you find Friday before Thursday?
A dictionary
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck!
Knock-Knock Jokes (27)
Knock knock! Who’s there?
Needle. Needle who? Needle little help right now.
Knock Knock! Who’s there?
Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Don’t cry!
Knock knock!Who’s there?
Donut. Donut who? Donut ask me, I just got here.
Knock, knock! Who’s there?
Howl. Howl who? Howl you know unless you open the door?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Annie. Annie who? Annie way you can open the door?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Canoe. Canoe who? Canoe come out and play with me?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes the police. Open the door!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Dozen. Dozen who? Dozen anyone want to let me in?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Harry. Harry who? Harry up and answer the door!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Ice cream. Ice cream who? ICE SCREAM SO YOU CAN HEAR ME!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Icy. Icy who? Icy you in there!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Justin. Justin who? Justin the neighborhood and thought I’d come over!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Olive. Olive who? Olive next door, hello neighbor!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Onion. Onion who? Onion mark, get set, go!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to open the door?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Spell. Spell who? Okay, W-H-O!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Stopwatch. Stopwatch who? Stopwatch you’re doing and let me in!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Theodore. Theodore who? Theodore wasn’t opened so I knocked
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Venice. Venice who? Venice your family coming home?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Water. Water who? Water you asking so many questions for?
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Wooden shoe. Wooden shoe who? Wooden shoe like to hear another joke?
Knock knock. Who’s there?
Cargo. Cargo who? Car go beep beep!
Knock knock. Who’s there?
Radio. Radio who? Radio not, here I come!
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Cows go. Cows go who? No silly, cows go MOO!
Dedication Page
To all those who believe in the magic of laughter and the power of a good joke to brighten even the cloudiest of days. May this book bring smiles, giggles, and a sprinkle of joy to your lives, reminding you of the simple pleasures that make every day a little brighter. With laughter and love, Holli
Request for reviews
We hope you enjoyed reading this book as much as we enjoyed creating it! Please consider leaving us a review where you purchased the book. If you have any jokes you’d like to share, we’d love to highlight them in our next book! Please send them to Bestjokesforkids@gmail.com. Scan the QR below to see the other books in our series.
The Best Jokes Every 6 Year Old Should Know
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